Good day, team,

Last week, I had an experience that I wanted to share for this week’s coach’s challenge.

Tuesday morning I had to take my car in for servicing. It was about 7 a.m., and the shuttle was supposed to take me back home. After waiting about 15 minutes, I learned that the shuttle driver was stuck in a traffic jam and wouldn’t be arriving at the dealer’s for another 30 minutes. So I decided to walk home.

It was about 45 city blocks, and although more of a walk than I usually take, it seemed like a nice morning for a jaunt. It was still dark when I began walking, but the sun was coming up quickly, and I watched the color of the sky as I walked the city streets.

These were not colors I usually see: muted pinks, with streaks of blue and grey painted across the sky. After a while, the sun came streaming down the sidewalk and as I walked into it, I was struck by the beauty of the sun reflected through colored leaves on the trees. One minute I was walking in filtered grey light, and the next, the bright sun was beaming on my head. What a glorious feeling!

After a few minutes, the sun began to fade, and the weather changed. Within moments, a light mist was falling. I zipped up my jacket and put my hood up. As I walked, I could feel the cool mist on my face, and the sidewalk began to darken as the raindrops fell on the concrete under my feet.

I spied a coffee shop on my left and quickly ducked in to dry out a bit and get a cup of coffee. As I sat in the shop, I watched people fly in and out for their morning coffee and pastries. Everyone was in such a hurry that I’m not sure they noticed whether it was raining or not. But the place was full of bustling energy, and it was a nice contrast to the quiet solitude I had experienced on my walk.

By the time I got home, I realized how invigorated I was by my unexpected walk. I felt so good in that moment. My early morning walk had made me happy, content, invigorated and peaceful, all at once. I wondered, “Why don’t I do this more often?” I could take an early morning walk each day, but I usually just get up, get my coffee, pop into the shower, get dressed and head out the door to work. Why would I ignore the chance to start my day with something that makes me so happy?

Your challenge this week is to identify something that makes you really happy that you don’t usually do, and do it. It can be something very simple, like taking a brief walk before work or during lunch. Maybe you get yourself a special treat at the coffee shop or take a tea break with another team member to talk about your weekend. Perhaps you find your favorite pair of socks in the drawer and wear them, even if they’re not the kind of socks you usually wear to work. Or maybe you won’t wear any socks at all, if that’s what makes you happy.

It’s often the little things in life that bring us joy. We just have to make sure that we take the time to do them and allow ourselves the happiness that arises when we do.

Have a great week!

Kathleen

Kathleen Doyle-White
Pathfinders Coaching

Good day, team,

The coach’s challenge this week is about setting healthy boundaries with people at work. Professional boundaries are important because they define the limits and responsibilities of the people with whom you interact in the workplace. When workplace boundaries are clearly defined, the organization works more efficiently because redundant work assignments are eliminated and task performance is accountable. When everyone in an organization is made aware who is responsible for what, healthier workplace environments are created. It then becomes very difficult for someone to blame others for their failed or inadequate performance and good job performance can clearly be identified.

When professional boundaries and priorities have been clearly defined, it’s very likely that a group can function effectively, even in the absence of its leader. If everyone on your team understands what to do, how to do it, and when to do it, then team members will feel safe in their roles. A smooth functioning organization is a tangible demonstration of their team leader’s commitment to their success, which creates trust in leadership. It is the responsibility of every team leader to set the tone of the group by clearly defining acceptable and unacceptable workplace behavior. An effective leader understands that failing to define boundaries, having no boundaries, or having inappropriately rigid boundaries can have an unfavorable impact on their organization and employees. In some cases boundaries need to be firm. For example, lying, stealing, or verbally or physically abusing others is never allowed. It may sound as if the responsibility to create a smooth functioning organization falls only upon the team leaders; however every team member has a role to play as well. It is the responsibility of every individual team member to be willing to speak up to a colleague or supervisor and clearly define their problem and help find a resolution that works for everyone.

Another important area that should be negotiated is interpersonal boundaries, because professional and interpersonal boundaries substantially impact workplace productivity and the quality of social environment. Interpersonal boundary parameters include:

* The tone people use with each other.
* The attitude and approach co-workers use with each other.
* The ability to focus on work objectives even with people you don’t
like or with whom you are having personal conflict.
* The ability to effectively set limits with others who have poor
boundaries.
* Clearly defining the consequences when a boundary is violated and
sticking to it.

Boundaries will have no meaning if your actions don’t back up your words.

**Here are some suggestions for setting healthy boundaries with your team members:*

*1. Know your limits: what you can do well within the allotted time frame.*
Don’t exaggerate your ability by overselling it. Give accurate estimates. Delivering a good product on time will improve your credibility, while missing deadlines or delivering a substandard product will only hurt your reputation.

*2. Tactfully and openly communicate about goals and limitations.*
Don’t try to undersell or misrepresent your ability. Underselling artificially prevents you from being able to demonstrate your professional skills, which might affect your career advancement. When discussing your limitations, focus on what you want and what you are willing to do to get it. Keep your focus on your positive intentions; ask for help when it’s needed to ensure good quality work; actively engage in problem solving, and don’t complain about the problem. Ensure that others are receiving the message you intended by asking for feedback when it’s not forthcoming.

*3. Be available to discuss differences and reach agreements.*
Reflect back your understanding of the other person’s needs, interests, and concerns. Attempt to negotiate win-win solutions.

*4. Don’t be afraid to let someone know if they’re acting inappropriately.* Work place bullying is much more common than we think; it can come in the form of expressing undo negativity towards another, intentionally excluding others from team activities, or ganging up on someone. It can also come in the form of domination by withholding information or not keeping one’s part of the bargain by actively engaging and contributing to the work. It’s important to let people know when they act out inappropriately and that it is unacceptable and won’t be tolerated. The emotional health and safety of an organization depends on direct and clear communication when someone has trespassed on a professional and/or personal boundary.

This week, try setting healthy boundaries with your team members. You’ll find that establishing boundaries and priorities go hand in hand because they both help manage interpersonal relationships in the workplace. Together they go a long way toward establishing productive work environments based on trust. Competent and credible leaders understand these principles and consistently model them for their staff.

Have a great week!

Kathleen

Kathleen Doyle-White
Pathfinders Coaching
(503) 296-9249

* Special thanks to the Faculty and Staff Assistance Program (FSAP) at UCSF for most of the information in this challenge. They are a great resource!
*

Today’s challenge was written by my associate, Kate Dwyer.

Good day, team.,

In talking with a client recently. I asked how things are going and he said something that continues to stick with me. He said, ” So far so good. As long as I can keep adding value, I’m happy.” Not “As long as I get paid what I’m worth…” or “As long as we meet our numbers…” or “As long as my job description doesn’t change…” or “As long as I don’t have to work with so and so….”

There are as many frustrations available in the workplace as there are workers. Injustice happens; good work gets overlooked and under-praised. Our attention gets stretched in too many directions at once and we lose our ability to be effective. Deadlines seem designed to stretch us too thin and new variables, that we didn’t even suspect, pop up and undermine our success. Worst of all, finger-pointing can spread like the common cold.

My client’s reply made me realize that every time I see my attention focusing too closely on the performance of others, it’s the perfect time to turn my focus back on myself and ask, “What can I do to add value?” Forget about what everyone else should be doing or who is doing what to whom; never mind all that. What can I do to add value?
That one question can take us back to the most powerful and effective stance we can take, regardless of the circumstances. It’s also one of the shortest routes to job satisfaction.

The challenge this week is to turn inward and ask that question. Whether it’s a relatively normal week, or you’ve got something very challenging going on, ask that question. Look and listen carefully, and then take action.

Have a good week, everyone.

Kate Dwyer
Pathfinder’s Coaching
(503) 296-9249

Good day, team,

This week’s challenge is about salesmanship and the power of belief. I once asked a client who is the CEO of a medium-sized company how he spent his time each day: what he actually did and what percentage of his time was spent directing, managing and leading. He replied, ‘”Frankly, I spend 95 percent of my time selling and 5 percent ensuring that we make a profit.”

He went on to explain that he realized that in almost every conversation he had-whether with board members, shareholders, team members, his direct reports, industry analysts, suppliers or customers-he was constantly telling them what the company did best, how it delivered better than anyone else, and why the people in the company were great.

Ironically, this man didn’t particularly like selling, and it hadn’t been his career path: He had started out as an accountant. However, he had learned over time that as CEO, he was the person who truly represented and spoke for the company as a whole, and if he couldn’t convince others of its excellence, the company would fail under his leadership. As he said, “If I can’t sell this to anyone within the company and anyone outside the company, then I shouldn’t be in this position. I have to believe more strongly than anyone else how good we are, how terrific our people are, and how our particular brand of service and products is better than anyone else’s. I have to know what we do best and believe that we do it better than anyone else. Otherwise, no one will believe me, and they’ll go with someone else who’s more convincing.”

His experience reminded me how powerful it is to have someone believe in us and in what we do. All of the good leaders I know believe in their people first and foremost. These leaders show-not just in their words, but in their actions-that they respect their employees, and they encourage them to continue to do what they do best. Interestingly enough, by doing this they also attract the same kind of respect and admiration from their team members. This doesn’t mean that they expect perfection from anyone, just that they see what is best in others and they continue to call on it in their daily business practices.

In coaching, we call it the “law of attraction,” that is, you get back what you give out. So if you’re unhappy with the work your people do and you think they’re not sharp enough, they tend to feel the same way about you. If you disagree with them a lot and humilate them in front of others, they will do the same to you, and so on.

Most important, what we reveal in our treatment of others is, in fact, how we feel about ourselves. We tend to project the same feelings we have about ourselves. So if we love and admire ourselves, we tend to give out those emotions toward others, and they evoke the same emotions in return.

All good leaders know that the real trick to selling anything is being authentic in the sale: You have to believe in what you’re selling. If you’re convinced that you and your people have the best to offer, then all you need to do is communicate it, and the sale happens. But if you don’t believe it, you can’t sell it. Whatever you believe is what you’re selling!

Have a great week!

Kathleen

Kathleen Doyle-White
Pathfinders Coaching
(503) 296-9249

Good day, team,

This week’s challenge comes from famous author and statesman Mark Twain, who wrote about life’s realities in a way many people could appreciate:

“A man may plan as much as he wants to, but nothing of consequence is likely to come of it until the magician circumstance steps in and takes the matter off his hands.”

This observation encourages us to pay attention to whatever is happening in the moment so we can respond to the opportunities it presents, even if they don’t fit our plan.

A friend of mine recently experienced the truth of Twain’s statement. About 12 years ago, he started a training business with a man he had worked with in the past. Because they had both been successful working for large companies that offered sales and marketing training to their clients, they decided to start their own company. They put together an extensive business plan that defined their core business as “a company that offers innovative, customized sales training to give our customer’s a competitive advantage.”

They contacted everyone who might be interested in their service, and they were off and running. Although they didn’t expect a profit in their first year, they actually made a little money, and in the second year, they doubled their revenues. The pattern fit their original business plan, and they were enjoying their success.

In the fifth year of the business, an unusual thing happened. More and more independent sales people asked to buy their training materials and the approach they used with customers. The partners realized that a brand new opportunity was emerging. If they could franchise their business model, they could expand their business far beyond anything either of them had ever expected.

However, when they went to their board of directors with this idea, some of the members argued that, since franchising wasn’t part of the original plan, the risk and investment it entailed might be unwise, especially since they were very successful operating just as they had originally planned. The dissenting board members logically asked, “Why change a good thing?”

In the end, the partners influenced the board members in favor of changing the plan to meet the circumstances. They franchised their business, and after seven years of being highly successful using the new plan, they recently sold the company for about $40 million. Their original plan was to become a $10 million company. But because they revised the plan to take advantage of new circumstances, they made four times as much money. Both my friend and his partner now spend most of their time on the golf course, looking for the right circumstances for improving their golf game.

This week, take a good look at your current circumstances. Are you ignoring an opportunity that’s right in front of you because it’s either not part of your plan or you haven’t seen it before? How often do you talk yourself out of maximizing something, just because it doesn’t fit your idea of the way it should be or the way it has always been?

Then consider whether your plan is limiting your ability to expand or improve. If the plan has gotten in the way of the opportunity, it no longer serves you. Don’t be afraid to try a new approach that better fits what’s right in front of you.

Have a great week!

Kathleen

Kathleen Doyle-White
Pathfinders Coaching
(503) 296-9249

Good day team,

Good day, team,

The title of this coach’s challenge could be “The Importance of Being Earnest.” Recently, in an attempt to upgrade my television service, I had the worst customer service experience I’ve ever encountered. Here are just a few of the low points:

The customer service department was located in the Philippines, although it’s an American company with corporate offices in Colorado. The customer service representatives go by the book, no matter what: Any question or situation that is not part of standard operating procedure is beyond their ability to understand, respond to or try to fix in any way.

I ended up calling the customer service department 17 times over a period of three weeks, and each time I had to explain my problems to a new representative. Even after having talked with a supervisor or manager, I had to start all over again each time I called.

The customer service representatives and supervisors I spoke with gave me inaccurate information and, in some cases, lied to me about service dates, the whereabouts of technicians, and adjustments that would be made to my account for the mistakes they had already made.

No one at the company who works in customer service ever called me back or initiated a phone call to try to straighten out the mess the company had caused.

The technicians they used were local subcontractors who, I later discovered, have as much difficulty getting straight answers or instructions from the customer service department as I did.

I’ve been a customer for three and a half years. During that time, I’ve paid this company approximately $3,000 for television service. Not one person within the customer service organization at this company cared about these facts. As far as they were concerned, I was just like anyone else calling in.

Over time, I discovered unprecedented four-letter words in my vocabulary.

After getting so frustrated that my blood pressure started rising, I finally tried to cancel the service, which I hadn’t yet received, only to find out that I couldn’t do that without paying a fine for early cancellation! It was in one of these final conversations that a supervisor finally said to me in earnest, “I’m sorry miss, if I allow you to cancel your service without charging you a fee, I’ll be terminated.” I thanked him for his honesty and felt that there was at least one person at the company who was sincere. But, the result was that he didn’t help me.

In the end, I googled the corporation’s name, looked up the annual report, got the name of the most senior executive I could find, called the corporate offices, and left a message asking for help. The executive called me back the following day and apologized profusely; within four working days, all of my problems were solved with a credit on my bill.

I’ve since tried to get to the heart of what was so difficult about this experience for me. The bottom line was that, out of all the customer service people I spoke with, only one person treated me like a human being. All the others showed no empathy and, even worse, no earnestness to actually try to help me. My situation was only resolved because I contacted someone at an executive level who doesn’t even work in customer service figuring that they probably don’t think that losing customers is good for their business.

The definition of earnest is acting “with sincerity and a strong intention.” In home buying, putting down earnest money shows the other party that you’re committed to the purchase, that you’re sincerely interested and engaged. These are exactly the qualities that were lacking in the service representatives hired to help me and other customers.

Some people might argue that the problem arose because this company outsourced its customer service department and, in some cases, that might be true. Expecting people from foreign countries to speak the same emotional language we do is naive. Part of the education that comes from traveling is our experiences of new food, rituals and customs, and seeing that these cultural differences grow out of different values and emotional constructs. What’s acceptable behavior in one country is definitely unacceptable in others. Unless people are trained to understand some of these differences, effective communication is almost impossible.

My point is that when you’re in the service business, what truly sets you apart from the millions of other service providers is your ability to serve your customers earnestly, so they know you intend to help them in any way you can. Your ability to empathize with their situation when they have difficulties is also key to good service. If you treat them as though you don’t care, you will not retain them. Lots of companies can attract buyers initially, but can’t keep them. In the end, it’s repeat customers who make a difference in the bottom line.

This week, think about the people you serve, whether external customers or the people in your organization. Are you earnest in your desire to help them? If not, what do you need to do to change your attitude toward your customers or your team members? Do your policies support your people being empowered enough to actually help the customer? Are you following the letter of the law and ignoring the spirit of the law in the way you treat others? Do you have ways of finding out what your customers or team members are actually thinking about their experiences with your company, and are you earnestly trying to do anything to improve these relationships?

Try finding ways to maximize people’s experiences of your service and set things in motion to make it better. If you work in earnest to serve your people better, they will serve their customers better, and you’ll all have a better experience.

For most of us, our only link to a company is through it’s customer service representatives: Whomever we talk to represents the entire corporation. My view of the service provider I mentioned above is that, with the exception of the senior executive I cried out to and the supervisor who responded honestly to me, everyone is incompetent and unengaged and couldn’t care less whether I have a problem with their service or not. They’re just doing their job… or are they?

Have a great week!

Kathleen

Kathleen Doyle-White
Pathfinders Coaching
(503) 296-9249

Good day, team,

This week’s challenge comes from an e-mail that a client* sent to me last week. Please have a look:

Friday, Aug. 25, began a week-long celebration of people being kind to others. Born in 1988, Be Kind to Humankind Week is now 18 years old. The week is made up of seven special emphasis days, beginning Aug. 25 and ending Aug. 31.

Speak Kind Words Saturday is my favorite weekly affirmation, because we all seem to completely forget that what we say has terrific influence (for good or bad) on everyone around us.

The spoken word is extremely powerful. It can make us, break us, hurt others, or heal others. Think before you speak. Literally bite your tongue if necessary. Once blurted out, your words cannot be taken back. They sting, and they can destroy a person’s self-esteem and self-worth. Unkind words can create hate and malice.

Consider these suggestions to make your Speak Kind Words Week better:

# A kind word is never wasted.

# Bite your tongue before you allow an unkind comment to flow out.

# Try not to curse and use foul language, especially around children or in public places.

# If you don’t have anything good to say about someone, don’t say anything at all.

# Do not gossip.

# Words are more powerful than most of us realize. Be aware not only of what you say, but how you say it. You cannot take back the unkind things you say. Words cut like a knife, so think twice before you say something you will regret later.

To learn more about Be Kind to Humankind Week and founder Lorraine Jara, visit www.bekindweek.org.

This week is your opportunity to find ways to be kind to others. Whether it’s by speaking kind words, or going out of your way to do something special for someone else, try focusing this week on being kind. There are good suggestions on the above-mentioned web site for what you can do each day of the week.

Have a great week!

Kathleen

Kathleen Doyle-White
Pathfinders Coaching
(503) 296-9249

* Many thanks to John Keith, president of Kavi Corp., for sending me this information.
*

Good morning, team,

This week’s challenge comes from a quote in one of my favorite books about management and leadership, “The One Thing You Need to Know,” by Marcus Buckingham:

“Mediocre managers play checkers with their people (vs. chess). In checkers the pieces all move in the same way, whereas in chess all the pieces move differently. Thus, if you want to excel at the game of chess, you have to learn how each piece moves, and then incorporate these unique moves into your overall plan of attack. Mediocre managers assume (or hope) that their employees will be motivated by the same things, driven by the same goals, desire the same kind of relationships, and learn in roughly the same way.

“They probably wouldn’t say it as as boldly as I have just done, but their approach to managing gives it away. When they set expectations for their people, they define in great detail the exact behaviors they expect to see. When they coach their people, they identify which of these behaviors each employee is struggling with, and then tell the employee to work on these behaviors and practice them until they become habit. When they praise people, they are most impressed by employees who have worked diligently to replace their natural style with these present behaviors. In short, they believe that the job of the manager is to mold, or transform, each employee into the perfect version of the role. Great managers don’t. They do the opposite. The one thing all great managers know about great managing is this:

“Discover what is unique about each person and capitalize on it.

“They know that even if employees are selected against the same set of talents or competencies, such is the complexity of human nature that the differences among these employees will far outweigh the similarities. The more one listens to the testimony of great managers, the clearer it becomes: Great managing is not about transformation-if you dedicate yourself to transforming each employee into some predetermined perfect version of the role, you will wind up frustrating yourself and annoying the employee. Great managing is about release. It is about constantly tweaking the world so that the unique contribution, the unique needs, the unique style of each employee can be given free rein.”

Your challenge is to identify what is unique about each of your team members and to support that in your management style. Try supporting all your employees’ unique strengths and allowing them to do what they do best. Get out of the way of your people’s progress. Let them take ownership where they want to. Try not to force your team into looking and acting the way you want them to. Assist them in identifying their strengths and allow them to work in the areas they enjoy the most.

Have a great week!
Kathleen

Kathleen Doyle-White
Pathfinders Coaching
(503) 296-9249

c Copyright 2005-2006 Scout Search, Inc.; all rights reserved.

Recently, a number of my clients have been asking me if I could send some of the challenge’s I’ve written in the past out to them again. This caused me to review many of the challenges I’ve written over the past two years. Here’s one I wrote 10/31/04 that I thought you might enjoy re-reading:

Good morning Team,

This week coach’s challenge is to be mindful of your reputation. A
person’s character is the reliability of himself. His reputation is the
opinion others have formed of him. Certainly, reputation is built on
deeds. Henry Ford said, ‘you can’t build a reputation on what you are
going to do.’

In working together, we cannot ignore what other’s think of us. Although
we make attempts to not take the opinions of other’s personally, we also
see that much of the way the world works is based on people’s
reputations. We find that our reputation builds in a positive way when
we learn to be more versatile in the way we deal with others. People all
like to be met on their own ground, so to speak, and when we make the
effort to be aware of their concerns and try to speak their language,
they appreciate the consideration. How often have you heard someone say
in reference to another team member, “she’s always easy to work with, or
he’s so reliable, that I love working with him.” These are comments
that begin to build a good reputation at work.

Socrates wrote, “The way to gain a good reputation is to endeavor to be
what you desire to appear.” We can see from his quote that having a
vision of how we wish to show up in our work environment is best served
by attempting to be that vision. If you want other’s to see you as being
efficient, than try being more efficient. It sounds simple, but we
rarely give our reputation much thought until we realize that our
reputation has been damaged in some way. I find that reputation is like
china, easily broken but not easy to repair.

Try thinking about your reputation this week and consider if your
actions are a good reflection of your vision of yourself and also of
your words. Take an action that you think will enhance your
reputation.

Have a great week!

Kathleen

Kathleen Doyle-White
Pathfinders Coaching
(503) 296-9249

(c) copyright 2005-2006 Scout Search, Inc., all rights reserved.