I’d like to examine what it’s like to experience fear and some good ways to deal with it.
Here’s some of what we know about experiencing the state of fear:
First, something happens that scares us and this stimulus activates our adrenal glands and a chemical reaction occurs in the body. We all know what it feels like. It’s
the surge of energy we feel when we are physically in danger and we need to move quickly. It’s the sweaty palms and the dry throat we experience when we have to give a speech in front of a large crowd. It’s the experience of butterflies in the stomach. The question is how do we deal with fear?
Being aware of fear when it happens to us tends to take some of the power out of the emotion. We can say, “I’m experiencing a lot of fear right now, perhaps I should take a moment to collect myself and breathe.” Or, we can try to reason with ourselves to realize that most fears fade when we face the facts of a situation. William Shakespeare wrote, “Present fears are worse than horrible imaginings.”
When we are attentive to what is before us, fear has less of a chance to control our thoughts and we are less apt to be in negative imagination about all the things that can go wrong in the future. Shakespeare also wrote, “Things done well and with a care, exempt themselves from fear.”
We can always ask for help when we are experiencing fear. Relying on our team members or family and friends to support us when we’re struggling is one of the great benefits of working and being together. The trick is to not be afraid to ask for help when we need it.
What I have observed about experiencing fear is that if I try to ignore it or push it away, it appears to get stronger. It’s similar to holding a stiff arm out to keep something away from you. The stiffer your arm, the more the thing you’re trying to keep away from you increases. However, if you’re able to surrender and to not hold the fear off, it often becomes less threatening. Somehow, fighting the fear only makes it worse. Whereas, accepting the fear and allowing it to wash over you seems to help.
None of us enjoys the way fear makes us feel, yet there are moments when it serves a valuable purpose. Our adrenal glands trigger the fight-or-flight response, and sometimes stepping away from a situation is the most effective course of action. However, if fear arises frequently and fuels ongoing anxiety, try allowing yourself to fully experience it rather than pushing it away. By acknowledging fear and letting it pass naturally, you may find that the accompanying anxiety begins to ease as well.
Kathleen