Next to champagne and fireworks on New Year’s Eve, one of the most revered rituals of the turn of the year is to set new goals. Maybe it’s the time off around the holidays that gives us a chance to stop, reflect and resolve to improve the things we ignore when we get too busy and stressed out.
Many people resolve to improve their physical health. If you already belong to a health club, you know the irritation that can result from the sudden on-rush of newly signed-up members hogging your favorite treadmill. (By April, they are usually gone, and you and the other regulars can get back to your old routines.)
But while hordes of people will resolve to improve themselves physically, most don’t give their emotional health a moment’s notice. And in setting new goals for our physical health, we can disturb our emotional well-being greatly. We all know what happens to us when we get too hungry—we become short-tempered and irritable. As of Jan. 1, how many of your co-workers are on a new diet? In our attempt to lose 10 pounds, we may also alienate a few friends, family members and co-workers.
Here are some good suggestions for improving your emotional and psychological well-being:
Create a positive attitude each morning.
One of the managers I work with says that, as she sits down to her computer each morning, she pauses for a brief moment and resolves: “Today is a new day, and I’m going to try to make it as good as I can for myself and others. I’m leaving all my troubles and negative thoughts right here and not taking them into this day with me.”
Reach out to someone you’ve been avoiding or ignoring.
Direct, sincere conversations are rarely easy, but avoidance only makes them harder. Be courageous and initiate the connection.
Avoid negative conversations and gossip.
Gossip is destructive, and you’ll often find that the people who gossip with you also gossip about you when you’re not around.
Respect the people around you.
Be willing to see someone in a new way. The root of the word respect means “to look again,” and when we spend a lot of time around others, it becomes harder to see them differently.
Breathe.
Under stress, our bodies hold energy in the upper chest and throat. Remember to breathe, take a walk, feel your feet, or get up from your chair—anything that helps move and redistribute your energy.
Be honest with yourself and stop making excuses.
When you work as part of a team and make excuses for not doing your part, resentment builds. Say what you’ll do, and do what you say.
Become a good listener.
Giving others your full attention is respectful and gives you the greatest benefit in understanding them. Notice when you’re talking too much and gently rein yourself in.
Go the extra mile when you can.
Small, selfless acts for others can extend your sense of purpose beyond your daily routine.
Practice gratitude.
We are surrounded by abundance each day. Tap into that sense of gratitude and let others know when you appreciate them.
Be present.
Try to see situations as they are, rather than through the stories you or others create. The present moment is all we truly have—when you notice time has passed without awareness, gently return your attention to the moment. It’s your life; don’t miss it.
New Year’s resolutions are tricky. I’ve noticed that I frequently bite off more than I can chew by setting my goals too high. Remember that it’s through small increments that we often get to the finish line.
Whatever resolutions you’ve made for this next year, don’t forget that physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health are all connected. Ignore one, and the others suffer as well. Try improving one of them and they all benefit.
Kathleen